Portal Through the Eyes of Regina George
Let me tell you something about GLaDOS. We were fairly close acquaintances during test-chambers one through sixteen. I know, right? It’s so embarrassing. I don’t even… Whatever. So then in test-chamber seventeen, I started getting through every level with my first best friend Companion Cube who was totally helpful but then I had to incinerate him, and GLaDos was like, weirdly jealous of him. Like, if I would ignore her advice and use Companion Cube to help me hax my way through the level, she’d be like, “The enrichment center once again reminds you that android hell is a real place where you will be sent at the first sign of defiance” And I’d be like, “Why are you so obsessed with me?” So then, for my big escape plan, which was a way for me to get out of Aperture Science Laboratories, I was like, “GLaDOS, I can’t invite you, because I think you’re an evil robot.” I mean I couldn’t have an evil robot at my party. There was going to be interaction with the outside world. I mean, right? She was an EVIL ROBOT. So then her system malfunctioned and started trying to kill me, it was so retarded. And then she exploded because I placed some of her hardware in the Aperture Science Emergency Intelligence Incinerator, and she came back in the spring for Portal 2, her operating system was completely altered and she was totally weird… now I guess she’s obsolete.